Welcome. You are in a place we'll call the "Sort of Court".
... Um. Okay.
Please state your name and profession to the court.
I am Layana, wife of Lord Hammet, the ruler of Tolbi.
I am the prosecutor and I am going to cross-examine you.
Who is the defense?
Sorry, we couldn't get Phoenix Wright, so you're going without a lawyer.
You just do not want to lose the case, correct?
... The defendant will remain silent unless questioned.
No way. I am out of here.
You cannot leave until I have asked you ten questions.
So ask them then. And then I'll sue your behind.
o_o;;; Question One: How long have you been married to Hammet?
Over fifteen years. But what does that have to do with...
Silence! Question two: Is your marriage stable and secure?
>=/ Yes. Very.
Question three: Has it ever bothered you that Hammet is fat and ugly?
Excuse me?! Looks do not mean everything!
So you agree that Hammet is fat and ugly?
Everything you say goes on the record.
Question four: Have you ever met Dodonpa of Lunpa?
That man kidnapped Hammet and did not give him back despite us sending ransom money.
So you definitely sent ransom money?
Did he receive anything else?
Just the money.
Hmm... Question Five: Has Dodonpa ever been to Kalay?
Certainly not. If he comes near us, he's going straight to jail. I mean it.
Not even through the secret tunnel entrance?
What secret tunnel entrance?
The secret tunnel entrance leading into the Palace. And we've been there.
So much for it being a secret.
Have you ever used this tunnel, perhaps to sneak out?
I have never had to sneak out.
Hmm. Sure. The tunnel would make a great meeting place, hmm?
I have no idea.
Question six: Have you ever been to Lunpa?
Someone rich like me should go nowhere near Lunpa.
But have you been to Lunpa?
No! I'm not stupid!
Question seven: Look at this picture of Dodonpa. Good looking, isn't he?
Well, he's... dashing, I suppose. But he's evil.
So you don't consider him better looking than Hammet?
He kidnapped my husband!
Question eight: Why were you so disappointed when Hammet was rescued?
I was not disappointed.
You gave Ivan hell for what he did.
... You are an FBM, are you not?
Um, er... yes. So?
You are biased.
Ivan brings back the man who is supposed to be the love of your life and you throw it in his face and tell him to get back on his quest.
Are you inferring I do not love Ivan?
No. I am inferring that you enjoyed the time you had without Hammet.
Question nine: Are you aware Dodonpa is a ladies' man?
Well, even his wife knows, and it seems Dodonpa often disappears, perhaps to catch the eyes of pretty ladies.
Perhaps he even went to see pretty ladies whose husbands he was hiding away so that they would not interfere.
Question ten: Are you having an affair with Dodonpa?
You can't speculate like that in court! And that's slander! And you can't prove anything!
I have a witness.
I would like to call the Crazy Hobo to the stand!
*hic* *burp* Where'sh de rum gawn?
State your name and profession!
Can't remember... *hic*
This witness is no good.
Crazy Hobo, do you or do you not play Golden Sun?
This is a random person off the street?
*hic* Me wifey looked in de sun once... her eyes gone bad... *burp*
We object to this monstrosity defiling the site with its loathsome presence.
What IS that?
Crazy Drunk Hobo! Do you recognise this woman?
Thars a womyn? Ah tawt it was a man...
Your Honor! I call for the removal of this useless drunk witness!
But there's no judge, Ivan.
You can't prove I'm having an affair with Dodonpa. So there.
*sigh* What would Phoenix Wright do... think outside the box...
We'll put you in a box if you don't get that smelly hobo out of here.
*sings* Rain, ran, down the drain...
Crazy hobo! Do you recognise her or not?
Looks like mah sisther... or wash it a brother? I forgot... *hic*
Goodness, how much has this hobo drunk?
I call for the arrest of this hobo for disrupting the courtroom!
Redrum! *taken away*
I give up. *bangs gavel* The courtroom finds Layana NOT GUILTY!
Well, no thanks for wasting my time.
And now, thoughts on Layana?
She yelled at me. ;_;
I think Layana is a nice lady and it was mean of Caz to torture her like that.
What the heck is the matter with you?
Kalay sounds nicer than that horrible Tolbi...
Why are you asking me?
Um... no comment.
I'm glad she took good care of Ivan.
I do not know who this woman is.
She's my wife. <3
Um... I like cookies?
I have no idea who Layana is so I cannot comment.
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